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mymindisfine

What's on YOUR mind?

 

You know those nights when all you can do is think?
When you can only lay in bed and dream of things,
For that little while before you sleep?


Sometimes to get there I need to forget that there
Are things that I should probably be doing.
Those nights when it’s like my life is just loose and I really need screwing.
But I need time to myself and it’s me I should be doing.
I should really be studying but instead I’m stuck being stuck between my bed sheets.
Because in this solitary solitude comes my soul’s subtle attitude that I’ve had it with responsibility.
And I’ve had it with having to do something all the time and feeling guilty when I’m not,
As though I’ll rot if I relax and to be successful I’ve just ought to act soon enough.
Those nights when you’ve had enough.
Enough with doing work. Enough with obsessing over dollar signs and wondering what I’m worth.
Enough with keeping my mind shut.
Enough with responsibility, I’m responsible for my well-being, now what?
Those nights when you succumb to the stressful build up of stress filled schoolwork and how I’m still hurt and fearful of dying alone.
And if you ask me “do you fear dying alone?” I’m gonna ask you if you’ve ever seen a dog without a bone?
What is a house if not a home?
Those nights when I’m too focused to be in the zone,
Those nights when I’m too awkward to sleep with anyone else but on my own.
If I’m supposed to be strong from the ground up then why do I always need to sound tough?
And remember to never let my guard down.
Those nights when you can never exert feelings of weakness, even when you are down.
And shit, I’d wear a large frown if I couldn’t relax every once in a while.
So I lay in my bed now and smile…
For there is peace on my mind.
Because in this bed I have escaped the grind
And now my mind is finally fine.
Those nights when I can escape the pressure of knowing that I’ve got to shine.
And that if I’ve got to shine then I’ve got to write lines,
And I’ve got to write those poems and that I’ve got to lie.
But before everything else, I know I’ve got to try not to do anything at all.
Once in a while I’ve got to let my eyelids fall fast asleep, like fish.
A dream down in the deep.
Those nights when social networking sites I’ll creep,
And get to know myself better than anyone else could.
We should all relax, breathe, sleep.
Yeah we need to eat, live, give peace
So we can laugh, love, succeed and repeat.
I’ve been in a relationship with me for almost 20 years, so I can.
But if there’s nobody I’d ever trust more than myself then why have I ever let myself down?
So I can get back up again.

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